www.Dont-be-a-hero.com is still offline but we're still not going to bother getting involved. Our blog will do just fine.
Hopefully our last post helped some of you avoid getting involved. Perhaps you were with family for the holidays and your relatives were about to start a fight. Hopefully you remembered your training from our last post.
We at the non-existent www.dont-be-a-hero.com website commend those of you who have incorporated our tips into every day living.
Today we're going to give you some practical exercises that you can do at home and "on the go" that will enable you to better avoid getting involved.
Exercise #1:
Repeat these at least once a day:
"Leave me out of it. You guys are going to have to settle this on your own."
"Sorry, sir that's above my pay grade."
"I'm afraid I can't do that, Dave."
"Get away from me, man!"
"I think I hear my mother calling."
"I'm sorry, this call isn't important but I'm going to take this call anyway. I'll get back to you." (It helps if you pretend to take a call you could ignore.)
Exercise #2:
If you drive by a homeless person or non-profit charity worker begging for money be sure your windows are rolled up.
Additionally, if you have power locks in your vehicle be sure to hit the "LOCK" button as they approach the window. Be sure to wait until they are close enough to hear and see the lock engage. Do not make eye contact.
Exercise #3:
Tell a friend that a mutual acquaintance has been talking about them behind their back. Then when they ask you to help settle the dispute, practice your excuses to not get involved.
This will help you perfect you skill at avoiding getting involved. If things get too intense, remember your training.
That is all for today.
Hopefully our last post helped some of you avoid getting involved. Perhaps you were with family for the holidays and your relatives were about to start a fight. Hopefully you remembered your training from our last post.
We at the non-existent www.dont-be-a-hero.com website commend those of you who have incorporated our tips into every day living.
Today we're going to give you some practical exercises that you can do at home and "on the go" that will enable you to better avoid getting involved.
Exercise #1:
Repeat these at least once a day:
"Leave me out of it. You guys are going to have to settle this on your own."
"Sorry, sir that's above my pay grade."
"I'm afraid I can't do that, Dave."
"Get away from me, man!"
"I think I hear my mother calling."
"I'm sorry, this call isn't important but I'm going to take this call anyway. I'll get back to you." (It helps if you pretend to take a call you could ignore.)
Exercise #2:
If you drive by a homeless person or non-profit charity worker begging for money be sure your windows are rolled up.
Additionally, if you have power locks in your vehicle be sure to hit the "LOCK" button as they approach the window. Be sure to wait until they are close enough to hear and see the lock engage. Do not make eye contact.
Exercise #3:
Tell a friend that a mutual acquaintance has been talking about them behind their back. Then when they ask you to help settle the dispute, practice your excuses to not get involved.
This will help you perfect you skill at avoiding getting involved. If things get too intense, remember your training.
That is all for today.
I'll be alright if I can just remember my Army training.
ReplyDeleteAwe crap.
This is bullshit, the owner of this blog should be murdered.
ReplyDeleteThis is bullshit, the owner of this blog should be murdered.
ReplyDeleteSOMEBODY can't take a joke. Just go curl up in a ball and take a nap.
DeleteHe posts the same thing every time. I think he should be deported somewhere for his lack of creativity and unreasonable rage. Even more so if he's just trolling, we have enough retards like that already.
DeleteIt's not family Guy it's American dad
ReplyDeleteBe sure to wait until they are close enough to hear and see the lock engage. Do not make eye contact.
ReplyDeleteA while ago I was at a car parking lot and a group of people were walking around with pens and those things you use when you want to write on a paper without any proper spot to put the paper on. I was just waiting to pick up a friend while relaxing in the car and reading some stuff. That monster knocked on the window and stared at me, I thought it was just going to be one of those "collect signatures for some random cause" bullshit, but after trying to understand what they wanted before deciding whether to write my name or not(they didn't speak the local language nor english, hell, they didn't seem to speak at all), I finally understood that they wanted DONATIONS/CHARITY (guessing they'd send a bill home or something). What the fck. Then I spent 5 minutes trying to shoo the person away and tried to get back into reading, but it was a pain to be disturbed like that.
Luckily none of the other people in that group tried again, but I wish I had heeded this advice back then and just noisily locked the car up while really showing with big gestures that I locked it and then avoided eye-contact until the problem goes away. Sure, maybe it can be called disrespect, but invading my private space in order to ask for donations without even being able to talk any recognizable language is far more disrespectful. I mean, most people barely have enough money for their own needs, why should they spend their hard-earned cash on other people just because they ask, don't give me any of that sympathy bullshit.